A Letter To My Sons

Each day I look at you, and know that not a single day of my life has been wasted. From the time you were born, you have filled my life with complete happiness, without you my life would have no meaning.
Our journey together has been the most enlightening and heart felt experience of my life, to know that I was entrusted to be your mother is by far the highest of privileges.

Four sons, what a blessing. I still cant believe that you are mine to love and to cherish, and even though the years are passing by quicker then I expected, I am ever so proud of the young men you are becoming.  You may have outgrown my lap, but you will never out grow my heart.

The road from childhood to manhood is not easy, it's often bumpy with unexpected twists and turns, but it's these bumps in the road that will strengthen your core and shape you into strong, caring men that will be able to face any curve ball thrown your way.
Just remember that you do not have to face lifes challenges alone, I am forever here for you to lean on, my strength is your strength, my knowlege is your knowledge, my heart is your heart.

You will always be "my" boys, no matter how old you are, and you will always carry with you a piece of my heart. You have made me laugh with pure joy, and cry rivers of tears.
You have seen me at my highest highs, and my lowest of lows, and I thank you for not judging me, just as I have never, and will never judge you. No matter what path you boys choose, you will always have my full support and unconditional love.

CHRISTOPHER my first born, we share a bond that no one can break. You are becoming a wonderful young man and you make me so very proud, you are about to leave the comforts of home and although it breaks my heart, I know that the time has come for me to let you go and begin the next step in your life. Just know that we are always here with an open door if and whenever you need.

JOSH from the time you were born, you stole my heart, who could resist those big blue eyes. You take life head on and even when it knocks you down, you do your best to pick yourself up and carry on. You to, are about to begin the next stage of your life, go fourth with confidence, for I know that you will succeed. I am so very proud of you, a great man you will become.

ISAAC my clown, the third of my sons, what joy you bring into my life. From day one you had spunk, you are full of life and character, not a day passes without you making me smile. Always strive to do your best in life, but never loose that "Isaac style", you are one in a million, and I am so lucky to be your mum.

BENJAMIN my baby Benny, my possum. Words cant describe the absolute pleasure you are. You are adored and loved by all, you are an old soul, wise beyond your years. Happiness follows you, you can brighten the darkest of days. Stay true to yourself, find the path that is yours to follow and remember you are forever in my heart.

My boys are my world

Another Year Older

Ok ,so the inevitable happened, I woke up this morning and yes it was still September *sigh* ...... I'm another year older, maybe the next falling star I wish upon, will grant my wish.

So initially, I refused to get out of bed, I was in hiding or maybe denial would be the best word for it I was not going to budge, what if I did look in the mirror and find NEW wrinkles AARRGG just to scary to comprehend, yes? but who can resist when there are smiling faces peeking around the bedroom door willing you to get up, to come out and enjoy THAT cup of tea made with love, and the excitment of gift giving (secretly wishing the gifts were for them) I willed myself up (OOOH was that a new creaking joint) ? it was definatly worth it, the love and cuddles make life what it is, precious and meaningful, and when you have a family like mine, it's exceptional.

I was lucky enough to recieve many lovely messages via phone, text and social media, my favorite being from a very special friend who wrote,
"Not old, good wine improves with age" AHHH Jules, you know just what to say to make me smile ....and how well you know me *wine* LOL

Spoilt, is what I was today !! (and I enjoyed every minute of it, selfish ? )

There is a little thing that has slowly been taking over every spare minute of my life lately, most of my conversations and inner thoughts if I am to be truly honest, my blog !! and the gift of my very own laptop, proved to me that my family have come to realise how much it has come to mean to me or maybe they were just sick of me fighting for a turn on the family PC
I was overwelmed, I had of course talked about purchasing one and hubby had agreed that it would be a good idea, but still it was not expected. So the day was spent setting it up while sipping wine AHEM coffee, having the time of my life.

I made it through the day, I am another year older, I did not fall apart, I do not feel any different and I did NOT recieve any new wrinkes PHEW (I'm doing the happy dance) !! but I did recieve lots oflove and wonderful birthday wishes, so thank you to all for caring, it means so much ......

Finally, my very own baby pink

I'm Calling It Quits !

Sorry friends but it's over, I've decided to call it quits.....
Quits on September that is.....

Did I scare you ?

I've come to the conclusion that I have reached my limit, my limit on aging, and since tomorrow is to be my 30 something birthday, I've made an executive decision that my family will be skipping the remaining three days of September and celebrating October 1st tomorrow instead !!

Call me vain, call me shallow, but don't say that I am the only woman who would love to turn back the aging clock a year or two or three or four  ;p

I know, that no matter how hard I wish upon that falling star, that come tomorrow morning, September 28th will still roll around and that I will inevitably turn another year older, and most likely will wake up to another wrinkle or two or three 

*sigh*
 I know what your all thinking "Toughen up princess" 
I'm thinking that to, don't worry.

I guess the best thing is, that not only is tomorrow Friday, but my whole family sare home to spend the day with me, that's if they want to of course, I will not hold them hostage ! Or will I ?
Maybe I will spend the morning splurging on a few new clothes, or maybe get my hair and nails done then enjoy a leisurely lunch and an afternoon at the beach with my boys........

Here's to turning 30 !!! AHEM something.

A Quirky Beginning, 22years of Love and Happiness

Today I'm feeling rather nostalgic, its not everyday that you get to celebrate a wonderful milestone in your life. Today, Hubby and I are celebrating being together for 22 years......

A quirky beginning we had, set up by hubbies mother and brother no less. Hubbies brother and I happened to attend the same church youth group, and were also friends at school. (Secretly I had a school girl crush on hubby at the time but was to chicken to make the first move).
One afternoon I happened to be over at their place, where I met his mother for the first time. Lucky for me, she decided then and there that I was the girl for her son and immediately she began to scheme !!
Making sure that hubby knew who I was first (Phew .. thank goodness he did) she told him that I wanted him to call me !! So that night he did, not at all expecting my reaction or what was about to take place.

The conversation went along these lines.

Hubby- "Hey you wanted me to call"
Me-      "Um no"
Hubby- "Oh OK, mum said that you wanted me to ring"

At this point I had kinda figured out what was going on and was trying my best not to giggle out loud, but secretly I was swooning as only 16 year old school girls do.

Hubby- "So do you want to go out sometime anyway" ?
Me-      " Um yeah sure, that would be good"

After hanging up, I was a giggling mess jumping around the house like a complete loser....funny hey :)

So we went on that date a few days later, and the rest as they say is history !!

Then

Now

Here's to another 22 years together, it may not have been all champagne and roses, but I most certainly wouldn't change a thing.

I love you xx

Ups and Downs ... A frantic Week of Challengers

Its been a little bit frantic around here this week, a multitude of ups and downs. The ups were great ! The downs, well let's just say they were rough, but we talked, we took the issues on, and faced them together, but hey ! thats family life for you, and by bringing things out in the open, dicussing them and standing together, families can get through just about anything.

The Downs...

The week began with my 16 year old son having to face a "workplace" bullying Issue, which unfortunately is going to take some time to resolve. The issue has been forwarded on, and is now being dealt with, within the company. As a family,we are facing this issue head on and rallying around our boy, giving him and the investigation our full support.

Our eldest son found out the hard way, that no matter how long you have known someone, or how well you think you know them, that some people only care about themselves and are selfish and unreliable. Not all childhood friendships will stand the test of time and in the end no matter how much it hurts, you need to take care of yourself first and do what's right for you. 

True friends will stand by you, support the decisions you make and take each step with you, no matter what. These are the friends you need to surround yourself with, not the selfish ones. They are not worth the heartache.

The Ups...

Since laying down the law about how much time son number 3 was wasting away in "cyber world", he wasn't amused but hit the school books with newly found enthusiasm (under the watchful eye of Dad) and got a big fat A on his science assignment. I am so proud of his achievement he is quite convinced that school is just for socialising Lets see how long this will last !

 I ramped up my health and fitness and managed to run 8km without killing myself I know it's not very far but for me it's a huge accomplishment, and to top of a great personal week of achievements, I managed to fit into a pair of "skinny jeans" without a look of horror crossing my face YIPPEE !

We had a great night at our youngest sons school star gazing with the "Mackay Astronomers and Star Gazing Club", how exciting it was to see the Moon, Saturn and the Milkyway so close up. I think it's ignited a new found passion/obsession in my boy. An expensive one at that, but educational none the less.

And to top it all off, today is the last day of school for term 3, we made it ! and that means lie inns, lazy days, fun and laughter.

More memories to make and more memories to cherish :)

Stop Bullying NOW !

Work place bullying, is any physical, verbal or mental intimidation by a person or group of people, that takes place within your work place environment. It is NOT acceptable...

"In very recent days, my sixteen year old son has fallen victim to workplace bullying. An incident at his place of employment, has left him shattered, inconsolable and looking for a new place to work.
As a parent, I am filled with rage, it is hard enough to see the effects that school yard bullying can have on your child, but to find out that an adult at your child's place of part time employment is the culprit, has filled me with absolute disgust !
I am not writing this post to "exposé" anyone or to "name, names". I am only writing this to make sure that anyone who reads this, knows exactly what forms of workplace bullying there are, and what action you are able to take.
No matter what your age, race, gender, religion or background, EVERYONE has the right to be treated with respect".

Some of the more common types of workplace bullying include :

• Hurtfull comments making fun of you or your work
• Making impossible demands, setting you up for failure
• Exclusion from work place activities 
• Playing mind games or 'ganging up'
• Using your roster to deliberately make things difficult for you
• Physical violence
• Verbal abuse
• Sexual harrasement 

Dealing with workplace bullying can be a difficult task, especially if you have no witnesses to back you up. Something that may help you out is if you keep a log book of all the incidents that occur. If you are lucky enough to have a witness, ask them to put in writing exactly what they heard, saw, know. If you have no witness, then please confide in somebody what is taking place and ask for help, after all, it could very well be happening to others as well as you.
Take your concerns to your boss (or as in my sons case) if the bullying is coming from your boss,find out who is the next person in charge,and take your case to them. It doesn't matter who, or what position the "bully" is, no one has the right to mistreat their co-workers or employees .

Once and for all we need to "STOP BULLYING". We need to stand together and wipe out bullying once and for all. We as human beings are equal and deserve to be treated as such, no one is more important then anyone else. It is a basic human right to be respected, and to be treated decently !!!

PLEASE, HELP STOP BULLING NOW !

(We have taken the next step of action against the person responsible for bullying our son, we were lucky enough to have two witnesses, and both my husband and I have thanked them profusely for their help and support with our boy on the night in question. We will not stand by and let this person get away with what they have verbally done to our son. I just hope that the action that we have taken will protect others and stop the same thing from happening again)

R U OK ?

I wish that I had been brave enough to ask for help.
I wish that I had not hidden my feelings so well, that nobody thought to ask me, R U OK ?

Depression has a terrible stigma attached to it, it makes those that it strikes, feel completely isolated, that the world is closing in around them, and that they can't fight their way out.
Many are to ashamed to reach out and ask for help, I know I was. I didn't want to be perceived as "weak". To admit that you are not coping, and that you need help ia a heart wrenching experience that no one should have to endure.

PLEASE !
Dont put on a brave face
Don't hide your feelings
Don't be ashamed to reach out

Needing and asking for help is NOT a sign of weakness (that was a long and hard lesson to learn, one that I am still working on each and every day) but of strength and courage.

We can all do something to help those who are not yet ready to reach out and ask for help themselves

In the time that it takes you to boil the jug and enjoy a cup of coffee, you could have asked someone if they are ok, and maybe you could be the one to change someone's life.

R U OK ? day is a national day held on the second Thursday of September each year. The day was launched in 2009 to inspire ALL Australians to step up and ask each other R U OK ?

So please, ask yourself, how hard is it to take a few minutes of your time and ask someone if they are ok ? How hard is it to reach out and hug someone, to let them know that you are there for them and that you care....

So today I am asking....
R U OK ?
My hand is here for you to hold
My shoulder is here if you need to cry
Plain and simple, I am here if you need me.
Please don't hesitate, I am personally reaching out to you all

xx

Back on track

So I've decided it's time to get off my lazy butt, and get back on track with my health and fitness. Over the last year, I successfully lost 16kg, and although it probably should've taken a lot less time to do so, I was still very proud of my effort.

However ! Since February, when a lot of things in life started to go pear shaped, I successfully gained back 5 of those kilos lost :(

I have now decided to take back control, that I am no longer going to be held hostage by the things that can go wrong in life, it's time I put all the negatives aside, focus on the positive, pick myself up and start a fresh !!

So two weeks ago I decided that enough was enough and I returned to the eating plan that helped me loose all that weight to begin with, and to my delight, that 5kg plus some have already gone !!

This time however, I've upped the challenge and set myself a fitness goal as well.

Starting yesterday, I set out for a 20min walk just to ease myself back into exercise, the weather was perfect and I enjoyed my alone time and listening to MY choice of music so much, that I ended up being gone for an hour and a half.......the BIG shock was, that I actually ran part of the way I haven't run since I was in school I was so thrilled, that I have vowed to stick with it day in and day out. And believe it or not, i did do it all again this morning and made myself run just a little further then yesterday, I think that if I push myself a little harder each day, I will be running the entire way before to long. :)

My intention to blog about my "journey" is not to bore you all, but to keep myself accountable !! I figure that if it's all in writing and out there for other people to read, that I would feel rather guilty if I failed.

So here's to a new beginning, the start of a new me, and may the final 10kg drop off and stay off for good.

Fingers crossed :)

A Special Moment

Today, I was lucky enough to spend some quality time with my eldest son. It's not often that we get to spend one on one time with each other these days, life keeps us busy, and as he is a shift worker, there are times when we can go a few days with only a good morning, or a good night shared between us. So to be able to spend a few hours together with no outside interruptions, made for the perfect day.

Time is flying by all to quickly, and it's getting alarmingly close to when he is planning to leave his "comfortable" nest take a giant leap out into the big wide world, and begin this new and exciting adventure of his life.

I always knew that this time would come I would be very naive to think it wouldn't  but still I cling to the hope that he may change his mind and stay home a little longer. He has after all been mine for 19 years, and truthfully, I'm not ready to let go just yet. The years have gone by so fast, much faster then I ever believed they would, and  It's hard, very hard but it's part of the parenting journey that we all must face.

We shared a moment today, a special moment that touched my heart and made me ever so glad that I was lucky enough to become his mum. He gave me the biggest hug that we have shared in the longest time, and he actually cried as he told me how much he is going to miss me when he moves on and how much he will miss the special times we spend "hanging out" together.

My heart was racing and tears came to my eyes but for his sake I managed to keep the flood at bay, as I told him how much it meant to me to hear him speak those words, that he has always been, and will always be my baby, my first born and the love we share is forever, and that no matter what, I am always here for him whenever he needs me and that the door to his family home will always be open if he ever feels the need to return. I also threw in the fact that he doesn't have to leave if he doesn't really want to !!! I know, I know that was cruel of me, but I couldn't help myself, I'd give anything for a few more years of togetherness.

The Battle of the "Post-Baby Bulge"

Loosing "baby weight" is one of those "big battles" that many women face. Some are lucky and bounce back in record time, and for others it can be a mighty struggle to regain even an ounce of their old self.
I have been both lucky and unlucky in the war against post baby wight. I was lucky enough to regain my pre-baby figure before I even left the hospital with son number one (admittedly, I was 18 years of age and everything is a lot easier when we are young), but with each of my subsequent pregnancies, it got a little harder each time to shift those unwanted kilos.

While watching an interview in the early hours of this morning with celebrity Jessica Simpson, I began to think about just how hard us women are, on not just ourselves, but on each other. Everything seems to be one large competition, with women being the Judge and Jury, and the battle of excess weight gained during pregnancy seems to be no exception to the rule.

Why do we do this ?
Why must we wage such a war on each other?
We should be supportive of each other, be strong, and stand together.

Jessica said, that the process of loosing the "post-baby bulge" is slower than she expected, and that being in the "Hollywood lime light" adds even more pressure.

I really don't think that it matters if we are "Hollywood babes" or everyday women, we all put the same pressures on ourselves to be the "perfect" woman. We all have insecurities, and how we look, and how others perceive us, is definitely high up on the list.

The fight to be "perfect" is an everyday battle that is forced upon us. We are confronted with the "perfect" body and the "perfect" face on a daily basis, with both magazines, adverts and television "choosing" to display "beautiful" people.
We are ALL beautiful in our own way, and to hell with the "post-baby bulge" and what is perceived to be a "normal" time frame to loose it, you, and only you, know when you are ready to begin the journey back, and no one has the right to judge or shame anyone into thinking that they are not beautiful just the way that they are !!

A Twitter get together

Last night coffee, conversation and laughter flowed, and new friendships formed, as our local River Front Coffee Club hosted the first "Twitter meet and greet" for our area.

I felt a little awkward at first, I don't usually have the courage to put myself in situations where I don't know anyone, and even though my stomach was doing somersaults, I put on my brave face, took a big girl pill, and headed off into the unknown.
As it turns out, I of course had nothing to worry about as usual I was nervous about nothing. Everyone was warm and welcoming and soon enough we all felt like old friends who had come together after a lengthy absence.

It seems that there is already plans in the works for another get together and this time there will be no hesitation on my end to attend.

It's Spring time

Finally its here, Spring time, my favorite time of year. The weather is perfect, flowers are blooming and the early mornings are filled with the happy chirps of baby birds. I love it and find that after the dreaded cold days of Winter, my motivation returns with much anticipation.
With another set of school holidays fast approaching, I am hoping to get the boys motivated along with me, for some fun out door activities, wish me luck ( I'm sure that I am in for a few moans and groans ) TEENAGERS !!! I think that I may just ban sleep inns !! for the boys anyway :)

Perfect skies and new leaves are beginning to sprout

My garden is starting to bloom

Its time to get out and about, blow away the cobwebs, enjoy the fresh Spring air and all that this wonderful time of year has to offer.