28 Oct 2012

I Often Wear The "Bad Parent Crown".... Guilty As Charged

Raising teenagers can be a lot of fun, but it requires a delicate recipe for success. It's an emotional ride of raging hormones, misunderstandings, mood swings, rebellion and attitude, and these are just a few issues we face when dealing with teens.
They will test your limits, try your patience and push every one of your buttons. They will cause you to raise your eyebrows on many occasions, and how we deal with all of this can be difficult, it's like walking on thin ice, a mine shaft, and unfortunately mistakes will be made.

I was reading an article the other day on "common parenting mistakes", about half way through reading, I stopped short, realising that it could very well have been written about me.
I'm the first to admit that I have made many mistakes in my parenting years. Heck who hasn't ? I am yet to see a baby born clutching a "how to" manual, but to be confronted in black and white made me realise just how many of the "major mistakes" I have committed.
Sure, mistakes are prevalent in parenting, but the reality of how many I have made scared the pants of me.

 What have I done to my kids ?

I know at times I have been inconsistent with discipline. Sometimes I've been SO mad, that I have "over" punished by grounding, yelling, and taking privileges away, then feeling guilty later on, I've kind of let them off the hook !!! Bad parenting :(
I have not always made myself available to listen to my teens at the exact moment that they need me, sometimes life with a large busy family gets in the way. I'm not making excuses, I should always as a mother make myself available when needed, but sometimes it just doesn't happen. Again, bad parent ..... "guilty as charged"
But the number one parenting rule that I am guilty of breaking at one time or another, and am not proud of, is being the "friend" instead of the "parent" ....... BIG mistake !! these are of course not the only mistakes that I have made, but probably the biggest.
I don't claim to be a "super mum" or a "super parent", I am far from a perfect human being. Reading the article led me to evaluate my parenting, to reflect on the particular instances where I know that by making these mistakes I could very well be the wearer of  the "bad parent" crown, and this makes me want to change, to be the parent that my sons deserve.

So coffee in hand, and high heels on, I am going to make sure that I pull myself together and make a concerted effort to be a "good parent" a "consistent parent" and leave the "bad parent crown" in the rubbish bin where it belongs.
I'm not saying that I will no longer make mistakes, but hopefully the big ones will be left behind.

1 comment:

  1. I do the 'friend' thing too Beck. It's so hard to go from being their friend as tweens, to not being friends when they are teens - you want the best of both worlds. Why can't we be their friend, AND discipline and have them respect us? I'm beginning to discover it just doesn't work that way.



Well hello there.... It’s been a while between blog posts, I needed time to gather my thoughts and to heal, both inside and out. Most of...