A LETTER TO ISAAC

Its bitter sweet when one of your babies reaches a milestone age. On one hand, your so proud of them, but on the other you want to keep them small and dependent on you, keeping them close.

On the weekend we celebrated our third sons eighteenth. Let me just breath deeply for a moment and take that in. I now have three sons aged eighteen and over. When on earth did that happen ? How did that happen ? My babies are all grown up now and its bittersweet.
 
Isaac,
Where do I begin. Bringing you into this world was not easy. Throughout the whole pregnancy I was unwell, but knowing that the end result would be a beautiful baby boy, my third son, was all I needed to know to get through that long nine months. Since the day that you were born, you have given us so much love and joy. Your giant smile lights up a room. Your funny and smart, caring and loving. Your sense of humour is brilliant, your quick witted, funny and a barrel of laughs. Even on the darkest of days your light shines bright.

Your life is just beginning my boy. The world awaits your brilliance. I wait to see what you will contribute. I know it will be something grand, for you lived your childhood without fear. You have always grabbed every opportunity that has come your way with gusto and I am sure that you will continue to do that just the same throughout your adult life.

Our family has so much love and respect for you my little Zack Attack. We will support you, and all that life has to offer you . Continue to dream big and know that no matter what, you will always have me in your corner. I love you more than words could ever say.

Love mum xx

beck xx

ONE THING BABY

If like me you have been following along with Babymac's One Thing posts, you would know how inspiring they are. They have been kicking my butt into gear since day one, showering all her readers with the motivation to tackle everything on their to do lists with gusto.

This week, my one thing was simple. So darn simple it took three years to complete. Yeah you heard me. Three years !

 Our living area is at the front of our house boasting four generous windows one of which has been missing the screen for three years thanks to one of my fluffy felines. We have had the new screen for almost two years and although every single day I past that tube of mesh a hundred zillion times, I put off fixing that darn window till tomorrow. Always tomorrow.

Well yesterday that tomorrow came.

Opening the windows yesterday I was happily greeted with a morning breeze, something that has been rare of late around here but of course it was only flowing through three out four windows. Frustrated I realised that the only way it would get done was if I stopped putting it off and just did it myself.

So I did...

We can now open all our front windows letting the breeze in and keeping all the unwanted bugs out. I have never been so excited to open a window before.

Do you follow along with Beth's one thing posts ?
If so, what was your one thing for this week ?

beck xx

KMART - THE PERFECT PLACE TO SPOIL YOUR MUM

Mother's Day is this Sunday. The day when mothers get a lazy morning in bed relaxing while waiting for breakfast to be served. Being showered by gifts and a full day of smiles and happiness with not an argument to be heard....

Yeah right !
And pigs may fly....

If your mother's day is like the adverts on telly, then power to you girl, but for the majority of us, though we are loved to bits, are married to the best guy in the world and have adoring children. Most likely Mother's Day is just another day on the calendar. Yeah I know, cue the nodding of heads.

So to make the most out of the day, start preparing your wish list if you haven't already  or go out and spoil yourself with something that you have been lusting after but have put off purchasing. And the perfect place to start is at your local Kmart.

Unless you have been living under a rock, you would know that Kmart has been leading the way with their good quality but affordable home ware's line. Oh the joy they have bought to millions of women as they walk the isles filling their baskets with the beautiful goodies they find hard to resist.

Here are a few of the things on my Mother's Day wish list...

Top left         - Urbano table lamp $20
Top right      - Abstract circular print $14
Bottom left   - Marble tea light holder $9
Bottom right - Prism terrarium  $8

Lightweight print scarves - $7

Are they or are they not gorgeous choices ? Gifts DO NOT need to be expensive to hit the spot. In fact gifts are really just the icing on the cake. Spending time with your family is what the day is all about, being loved and cared for by the most important people in your life.

I hope that each and every one of you have a beautiful Mother's Day filled with light and love.

beck xx






{this is in no way a sponsored post, just a collection of beautiful Kmart products put together to showcase my favourite items at the moment.}

TAKING STOCK - April 2016

As we hurtle head first into a brand new month, its hard to believe just how fast this year is going. I have been unable to spend as much time here on the blog as I would have liked, but here's hoping that that is about to change.

At the end of each month, many bloggers join in with the beautiful Pip of Meet Me At Mikes to Take Stock of their month and share with others what may or may not be happening in their lives. I've been slack of late, but I love reading the posts just as much as I love writing them.

So here, is my month of April....

Making   : Dinner every single night. Did we really sign up to this when we became wives and mothers ?
Cooking  : A few new recipes that will one day make it onto the blog.
Drinking : Trying to cut down on wine and drink more water.
Wanting  : To start yoga back up but to worried about my weight to walk into a studio.
Looking   : Forward to some cooler weather.
Playing    : Playing lots of old music from way back when. Is it possible that it sounds better the older we get ?  
Deciding  : If I want to grow my hair again... I know, I'm crazy.
Wishing   : That illness was not apart of life, that when our time comes to move on from this life we   just go to sleep not knowing any pain.
Wondering : When my kitchen is going to be fixed after flooding six weeks ago.
Loving        : The singing dogs on the Subaru ad on TV
Pondering  : What is next for me. With the kids all grown, I need something to occupy me.
Considering : Paint colours yet again.
Buying     : Art supplies and loving that I am finally starting to paint again.
Watching : MKR and cheering on the local Miner boys. Good on them for doing so well.
Needing   : Prayers for my beautiful sick Uncle.
Questioning : So many things about life.
Smelling   : Rain on the hot pavement.
Wearing   : Jeans, although its been awful hot I have dragged them out of hibernation for when the     cool weather arrives. ( if it does)
Following  : So many beautiful new Instagram accounts. Its such an addictive platform
Noticing     : All the Autumn pics from down south,  namely Baby Mac's and being jealous of the changing leaves and burning fires.
Admiring  :  My beautiful cow hide that I got from Melbourne last year. I love it so.
Sorting  : Always sorting the pantry.
Getting  : Tired of the constant hot dry weather of Nth Queensland.
Disliking : Doing the dishes by hand. FIX MY KITCHEN ALREADY.
Feeling : Like a big life change is warrented.
Snacking : Way to much.
Hearing : The family of Kookaburras each morning is a lovely way to start the day.

So there is my April of sorts.
How was your month ? Was it jam packed or laid back ?

beck xx

FEELING ALL THE FEELS

During the course of my life I have been continuously let down and cast aside by a family member. Mentally abused to the point that the mere mention of them has at times made me physically sick. Although not solely to blame, I would go as far as saying that this member of "my family" are a major factor of my depression and anxiety.

I have never acknowledged that before today...
Maybe that is a huge milestone for me.

I don't know why I haven't been able to admit that before, I know that deep down I always knew it, but to actually speak of it out loud was not something I was ready to do before now.

Today mid morning I was going about my usual business. Washing, folding, cleaning you get my drift, when I received a phone call that was in my books very unsettling. I knew that to check on this person there was only one thing that I could possibly do, as much as I wanted to let the conversation that I had go,  I knew that this was not the right thing to do. After procrastinating for quite some time, I rang my husband to ask his advice. I already knew what he would say, I was just trying to avoid the inevitable.

I was physically sick, but I made that call...

Surprisingly for the first time in a long long time it went well. My questions were answered, the conversation pleasant, I was on edge the whole time, waiting for the other shoe to drop. I kept expecting to be dumped on, for the sarcasm to rare its ugly head. It didn't.
I don't know whether it was mutual concern for the other person involved that warranted me to make this call or something much deeper, but for now I am not going to read to much into it or make myself sick with worry trying to analyse every inch of the conversation. I have decided to let sleeping dogs lie and take one small step at a time, starting with admitting the affect this person has had on my entire life and why for so many years a deep cut has not been able to heal.

What has made me come to this point today ?
A day that started out as a normal Tuesday but ended with an explosive admittance.
Why am I feeling all the feels of a roller coaster when my feet are firmly planted on the ground ?


Today, on this ordinary Tuesday for the first time that I can remember...

My father told me that he loved me.


Linking up with Essentially Jess for IBOT and spilling my guts to get it all off my chest.

beck xx

WHEN LIFE GIVES YOU LEMONS

HELLO....  waves frantically, yes I'm still here. It's been an emotional roller coaster around here, so much so that I needed to stop, breathe and deal with the forces that be. Sometimes that's just the way life is. It gets you, when of course you least expect it.

For those who don't know, just before the Easter long weekend our kitchen burst a pipe at midnight and flooded our kitchen. It is still an ongoing disaster that has seen workman come and go but not much progress. We still have no floor, no dishwasher and unusable cupboards. Although it has caused inconvenience, I'm still singing the praises of insurance.

A setback happened in my eldest sons world as well last week. On Thursday afternoon he was told that the company he works for was closing down one of its stores here in Mackay thanks to the economic  downturn we are currently going through, and that he no longer had a job at the end of the month. He was devastated, he loves that job so much. It was tough being witness to his heartbreak, but like the trooper he is, he set about applying for jobs right away.
Thankfully this disaster had a happy ending....
At work the next day, his boss pulled him aside and said she was over ruling the 'head honchoe' and reinstating him at the other store. By a miracle of God my son had his job back.

Although we have had a difficult time dealing with these inconveniences, there is always someone that is going through something much bigger than you. Yes these things tried our patients and brought unwanted stress into our lives, they are however small in comparison to the battles of others.

A few weeks a go, my beautiful Uncle was diagnosed with an aggressive form of cancer. It hit our close family very hard, but we were staying optimistic and leaning on our faith for a positive outcome. Things are not going well. Just three weeks after his diagnoses, he is in intensive care. My thoughts are consumed by him and his battle, my heart with my mum as she sits beside him praying for God to lay his hand on her brother and perform another miracle. If things don't go well it will break her, they are so very close.
Even though at this stage things are not going as well as we want them to, I am keeping the faith and praying more than I have in a long time. I ask those of you who pray to add my Uncle to your prayers and keep him in your thoughts.

On a positive note, things can only get better from here, life has delt its hand, and rolled the dice on a bad run for us this past month. But with this brand new shiny week, and the beginning of a brand spanking new school term, I am praying that for now at least we have had our share of crap and are entitled to a little happy.

beck xx

THANK GOODNESS FOR INSURANCE

You can almost guarantee that if something is going to go wrong it will happen while your husband is away. I've had my fair share of challenges over the years. Cyclone warnings, kids in hospital, leaky fish tanks and a car accident. All happening while my hubby was away for work. Lately we have had a good run as far as disasters go. I thought we had filled our quota and were due smooth sailing for a while.

I thought wrong...

Wednesday last week was about as normal and boring as a week day can be. Our evening progressed as normal, dinner, showers, TV.   I headed to bed to read and the teens stayed up which is the norm when school is out. I turned my light out around 11.30 ready for sleep knowing that come the next day hubby would be back in town and all would return to normal.

That was not meant to be...

Drifting in and out of sleep I thought I was dreaming when my boy burst into my room yelling that the kitchen was flooding. It took me a minute to realise that it was actually happening and I sprung into action.
The kitchen was indeed flooding. Water was pouring out from under the sink and it was hot. While one teen helped me to turn the water off to the house, the other teen was piling up towels to prevent the water from going any further into the house. It was a disaster.

It turns out that the steal hose from the hot water tap had blown a hole. It had been perishing for a while without us knowing, and decided to blow in the middle of the night. Typical huh !!

Thankfully our Insurance company Suncorp is covering us. I cant thank them enough for the speedy service they provided. By the next afternoon we were surrounded by large fans and dehumidifiers to dry everything out and to prevent mould. Our beautiful wooden floors have been pulled up and the kitchen cabinets have to be replaced along with the dish washer. It is going to be a big job, but yet again I am ever so thankful that we are fully covered.

It turns out that its common for these new fangle tap pipes to burst, so please check your pipes regularly so that this doesn't happen to you.

beck xx
Linking up with Essentially Jess for this weeks IBOT