Yesterday, I spent a few lazy hours with a coffee in hand, reading wonderful posts from many inspiring women that linked up with "We Heart Life" for their I Heart My Body campaign.
WOW !! I was actually lost for words. I was completely inspired, rocked to my very core.
I laughed, I teared up.
OK, you got me. I cried RIVERS.....
You ladies are amazing, you are brave, you are incredible, you are beautiful, and you all have every right to "love" your bodies, I so want to get to the place that you all appear to be at. I am completely in awe of you.
I use to be proud of the way I looked. I was fit, I was thin, I could wear anything, and even eat anything at all that I wanted. Now, five pregnancies later, and a lot of aging, I'd rather hide behind my bedroom door and not humiliate myself....
I'm not at all happy with the way I now look, and I have no one to blame but myself.
Only five years ago, I was a gym junkie, I spent about 2-3 hours a day, 5 days a week working out, I was a size 8-10, I was happy with my appearance and I felt worthy.
Fast track a few years, and I fell apart at the seems. I cant pin point exactly the moment that things changed, I just know that things within didn't .... feel right I guess. I gained A LOT of weight :( I really let myself go, actually I kind of gave up, I didn't care. It had nothing at all to do with my family, they are my world, and have always been the light of my life, but it had everything to do with me, myself, and how I felt within. I no longer felt worthy. Just a shadow of myself.
Silly I know.
Today however, I have kind of pulled myself together (with a lot of help from my family) and I am slowly realising that maybe I am worth it, that maybe I can get back to the "old" me. It will be a lot of hard work, but I am ready and determined to make a change.
I am a long way off from "loving" my body, but every single one of those amazing ladies that joined in yesterday with the "I Heart My Body" campaign have inspired me to take a better look at myself, and maybe join in next year with a positive attitude, a smile, and the courage, to maybe take and share a picture of myself in a swimsuit........I SAID MAYBE !!
I may also know by then how to "link" up (I'm still learning this blogging process) LOL
Thank you EVERYBODY for sharing your stories, you truly are ALL amazing women and the people in your lives are so very lucky to have you xx
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