After watching the coverage of "Hurricane Sandy" today, it constantly amazes me how quickly things can change. Life holds no guarantees for anyone, and we are all oblivious to what is actually around the corner for us. Day by day, we go about our daily lives not expecting the worse, but hoping for the best. For both ourselves, our family and friends.
A year ago today something unexpected happened in my life. I lost my best friend of ten years. She didn't pass away, but fell into a tangled web of drugs, alcohol, lies and deceit. To watch her destroy herself and her family has been difficult. She has left her husband, walked away from her children, and turned her back on all her old friends.
I've tried hard, as many others have to be there for her, to help her mend her life and get back on track, but all attempts to help have fallen on deaf ears and she refuses to speak to anyone from her old life anymore.
We met when our sons started school, they became the best of friends and so did we. We spent many hours being "coffee buddies" The joy of watching our boys grow up together, and their friendship strengthen was a joy to us, our families were inseparable.
When things started to fall apart for my friend, it naturally began to affect her son, he fell completely off the rails and fell into a "not so nice crowd", a crowd that was known for getting into quite a lot of trouble. Being concerned for our sons well being, we as his parents had to make the decision to cut contact between the boys outside of school. It was tough, at thirteen he didn't completely understand our reasons for cutting his contact with his best friend, he was hurt, but for his sake we stood firm, and thankfully things for our boy have turned out just fine.
For me, I no longer have contact with my old friend. It hurts, a lot. I see her around now and then, she looks terrible, and as sad as it sounds I pray daily that I don't receive a call that she is no longer with us, I pray that she will pull herself out of this slump that she has fallen into, and comes to understand that she is worth saving and deserves to live a full and happy life.
So today, a year after I realized that I could no longer help you, its time to finally let go.
Its time to say goodbye to yesterday, to our friendship.
I think that I'm ready now.
Memories linger in my mind,
My thoughts connect our past.
Tears blur the present,
And hope for your future is in my heart.
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